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First, remember that your teen’s social maturity may not be in line with his or her physical maturity.

In other words, many teens with autism feel the physical desire for sexuality before they have the social competence for successful dating.

While role-playing, observe how your teen shows interest, expresses compliments and responds nonverbally (e.g., smiling, nodding in agreement, making eye contact). Remind your teen that it’s important to stay at a comfortable level.

Explain that these behaviors send positive messages to the other person. Discuss who, when, where and how to ask someone out. Someone your age, who you like and who talks to you and is nice to you. Once you’ve gotten to know each other, once you’ve sensed that the other person is interested. Discuss that this may be different than what others are doing or what is shown in the media. When it’s time for the date, help your teen dress appropriately and otherwise look his or her best.

For many teens with autism, the issues of dating and sexuality come up later than one might expect. Some are eager as young teens, while others don’t appear interested until much later.

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However, some difficulties tend to be particularly relevant for teens with autism. Just keep them in mind while helping your teen navigate the dating process.I was young and confused, and having good sex with people that had a penis wasn't really what I was expecting.A lot of my straight friends told me that it was great and blah blah blah — but it was kinda just weird to me.It didn't hurt, it wasn't traumatic, it just wasn't enjoyable.But I felt like I had to pretend to like it and that's just how it was.




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